At the very beginning of a career, we’re bound to produce works that reveal the very core of our being. Even if they’re assignments given by a professor to learn framing, these somehow end up being the most personal pieces of your life. Sometimes, embedding these works within the public atmosphere without any subjective training can cause great stress, i mean, these works are entirely you– revealing your passions, hopes, and, even sometimes, unintentionally exposing a deep/dark hidden matter– people will see that.

This is the case for a secret gem i found lurking through vimeo. Rick Patton lived through his films, and has just decided to share them with the world. His personal film school portrait is my favorite, it reminds me of the first time i picked up a camera and experimented with film. I was so overwhelmed, that my film made absolutely NO SENSE to anyone but myself, and of course, drowned in embarrassment by the harsh critiques and discussions in the classroom, that film never saw a day of light.

As i was looking through his footage, i thought: someday this will be me; revealing who i used to be, and being okay with that.

Time Portrait:
1965. 16mm. 12 minutes, black and white.

“This is Rick Patton’s first film, made when he was a student at Antioch college. The stylistic premise was that the film would be a self-portrait, like a still photograph, that changed and grew through time. It is not a story, but it does revolve around a love affair gone wrong and a broken heart. Patton did not show this film for 40 years. He found it embarrassing. Now in his 60s, he is OK with it. All filmmakers have a first film.

This film was made in New York City in 1964 while Patton was on a coop job, working as an assistant in a small animation studio. Avant Garde (aka Underground) filmmaking was, at that moment, in 2 camps. Emotionally charged films like Maya Deren’s “Meshes of the Afternoon” and later, Kenneth Anger’s “Fireworks”. These films were loosely referred to as Psychodrama. Patton’s film falls roughly into this camp. The other movement in the avant garde was more formal and structural. The best example was the work of Stan Brakhage. Within a couple of years the films of Andy Warhol, films made by simply setting up a camera and turning it on, would suck the oxygen out of avant garde filmmaking in New York City. The creative center of gravity moved to San Francisco”